Friends, I’m struggling.  I know that I’ve been lighthearted about this in the past, but I’m starting to realize that I have a real issue on my hands.

Normally, if I remove something from my life, I have no problem staying away from it. Now, food can’t possibly count of course – it’s not exactly something you can remove from your life and continue living. But outside of food I’ve been generally successful.

For example, smoking.  I didn’t smoke for very long – just through college – so I know it might have been more difficult to quit had I been smoking for many years.  I remember the first few days at college, how I could instantly tell who the big kids were.  The cool kids.  They were the ones who would huddle together outside between classes, obscured by an ever-present cloud of smoke.  Smoking was where it was at, so I picked it up and yes, I did make lots of friends during those smoke breaks.  When I left college, I quit smoking.  End of story.  No trouble.

I am usually very good about being disciplined on other matters as well.  I’m up at the same time every morning without using an alarm clock. 

Okay, that’s the only other thing I can think of being disciplined with.  Give me time to come up with more.

The point of all of this is: I’m struggling now.  With my Starbucks resolution.

Have I managed to keep it so far? Yes! I haven’t purchased a single cup of coffee yet (in fact, it’s been since before Christmas!) from Starbucks, Dunkin’ Donuts, McDonald’s…anywhere.  I’m really proud of that, because I walk right past many opportunities to give in every morning.  It would be so easy to give in and take my place in line.

I have to ask myself the real reason behind my problem with these places.  I mean, it’s coffee, right? Coffee is coffee is coffee when you get right down to it.  If I need it so badly, I can make a free cup at work.  No biggie.

But it’s clearly more than that.  For one thing, it plays into my penchant for instant gratification.  I want it? There it is.  I’m gonna get it.  It’s a just another thing for me to waste money on.  It’s something to break up the monotony of the morning, a treat which has turned into an expensive habit.

Another underlying issue is, I believe, the fact that overpriced coffee has become somewhat of a status symbol.  Hasn’t it in some way? The fact that you can afford to walk around with an overpriced cup of coffee in your hands says something about you.  I wanted to be one of the Starbucks sippers on the train.  I still do. And I just made the connection between this and my college smoking – I want to be one of the cool kids. When will I ever learn that I will never be cool?

Plus…it’s yummy.  I’m a food addict as it is – maybe I should change that to “yummy addict”.

Regardless of the “why”, some days are most definitely easier than others.  Today was not an easy day at all – but I kept on walking.  Maybe the fact that I can stay strong and stay away from what’s really just a money waster can serve as inspiration in quitting some poor eating habits as well.  I’m finding that I’m way better at disciplining myself than I thought I was – it may suck at the moment, but it’s not the end of the world.  I’m learning.

One day at a time, right?

Have you ever had to quit something? What’s your story? Do you have any advice?

  6 Responses to “I’m a Weak, Weak Woman”

  1. All the cool kids sip Starbucks! It is an affordable indulgence, I mean, I can't afford Louboutains, but a $5 cup of coffee masquerading as something special because I call it a latte, that I can afford. But when I realize that a pound of ground coffee beans from the grocery story costs less than one trip to Starbucks… makes me feel like I've given in to the biggest fleecing in the world. Starbucks really isn't all that much better than my Green Mountain cuppa.

    That being said, I caved and bought a Starbucks giftcard, er, "rewards card" for myself because I liked the pretty Jonathan Adler design. And five cents from each swipe goes to helping starving children in Africa. Yea, I am a sucker for merchandising!

  2. I wrote a blog post over the summer on how some bloggers are like Starbucks. All hype, and probably not the best coffee, but they're popular anyway. :)

    What if you got a Tassimo or Keurig and made Starbucks on your way in?

    Not holding the same cool cup, I know…

  3. Yeah, a particularly bad habit of mine, and I just fell off the wagon..picking at my nails…I need to stop doing it again…totally sucks falling off the wagon!

  4. OMG! I want to comment on the starbucks thing but i am stuck on the fact that you don't have to use an alarm clock!!! WHAT? I have to set like 3 of them. And then I'm STILL late. Oh, if I just had an ounce of your "get up and go" i can only imagine the things i would achieve LOL

  5. i had to go to kate's dance studio for a parent meeting tonight and i was trying to figure out if i could cleverly pass a starbucks on the way there. :)

  6. Dh got me a keurig and love how it is instant and great coffee! Or how about an espresso machine? I can't tell you how much money I have saved over the years as I used to be like you and wanting those overly priced Starbucks or other coffee place drinks. I do go occasionally, but I'd rather spend moola on something else. :)

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